4:30am, my brain woke me up and started thinking all about the installation/performance for NYC gallery in Feb., of me braving through snow and subway crowds and small hostel rooms alone, of the Jan. residency/installation/performance with my first long hour drive alone, of husband, cats, families in Taiwan and possible frost in the yard.
9:30am, fell to the ground with one leg squashed under neath the heavy trash bin I was pulling.
Immediately it reminded me of those movie scenes in which a poor baster lays under a fallen roof beam with flame all around it. Not able to pull it's leg out, (s)he watched the flame swallow her/him alive.
Luckily I was able to save my leg and went on limping.
Yesterday, they dug up the bones of my 10-year-passed sister. According to Taiwanese Buddhist custom, we would to collect her bones, cremate and store the ashes in a Buddhist temple or the family cemetery. Could not cremate her 10 years ago because mom and dad could not bear watching her burned. I wish I was home to visit her once again, a sister who no longer holds a physical form. She must have a big skull, I think! According the our eldest sister, she bio-degraded well, has the lucky tan/brown sheen on her bones and smells like lovely wooden smoke, thanks to the high quality wood of her coffin. My dear sister, melted to the soil and devotes her new life nurturing trees. As smoke, poof! she is gone. While I am still here heat-packing my leg, manifesting relationship with the material world.